failure

 The bishops published their guidance and their prayers.

My initial response is here, and it's ten minutes, but hey ho.

If you don't have ten minutes, let me say - basically I'm not a fan. After years of trying to advocate for the equality of all people, of trying to get the question 'are we all equally human' on the table, the bishops have addressed the issue, they have answered the question.

And their answer is - 

No. No, we aren't all equally human.

Oh, they're asking us to celebrate this historical moment, this time when the Church of England apologises to LGBTQI+ people, this time when it offers some thoughts and prayers for us, this time when the Archbishop of York can shed tears as he recalls a dead gay priest not being able to get married in church and know that it would be different now...

But it wouldn't be different now. Because the Bishops' response to LLF (and everything that process brought) is to say - no change in doctrine. That is, not only is marriage still only for straight people, but they really aren't clear what the moral status of LGBTQI+ people is generally (they think they need to do more work to understand trans people, for example), and they especially have doubts about gay people having relationships that might be sexual (the prayers they offer shouldn't be thought of as implying approval). 

Yes, the old nightmare Issues in Human Sexuality will probably go and probably be replaced with something else (and the Bishop of Oxford hopes that means gay priests can marry) but the 'something else' will come under all the theology of the response. And all the theology of the response is - 

LGTQI+ people are second class human beings. Not to be fully trusted. And certainly not to be given the same rights as real people. Straight people. 

The prayers offered are a curious mix of some liturgical prayers already out there, and some new, rather insipid ones. If the new ones are compared with, say, anything the Church in Wales offers, or even similar ones the Church of England offers for the re-marriage of divorced people, then the difference between how the CofE treats LGBTQI+ people and how anyone else treats a human being suddenly feels blatantly obvious.

What is not being offered is a genuine wedding blessing service. We don't bless these weddings; they aren't between straight people. So there's no welcome, no suggested preface, no vows, no ring exchange, nothing that could leave anyone feeling we are getting anywhere near blessing a gay marriage. 

And as I raise all of this and point out that the C of E is indeed marking a historical turning point - but by creating clearly, in writing, for the first time, a Second Class Humanity, joining the Dutch Reformed Church of South Africa on a road to infamy, I have my intro filled with people shouting at me and saying - 

BUT WHAT COULD THEY HAVE DONE! STOP COMPLAINING! SYNOD WOULD NEVER HAVE VOTED FOR MARRIAGE!

People quote to me the Archbishop of York at Friday's press conference:

"This is the fullest possible pastoral provision that we can offer at the moment without changing legislation, which would take years anyway - years and years."

I first wrote to Archbishop Rowan in 2011, alongside my submission to the Pilling Commission. That's a dozen years ago. And I came late to this party. Years and years?

What the hell does he think has been happening?

We're now told there will be a five year time scale to see how these thoughts and prayers go, and then we'll look again at how we might move forward.

Years and years?

So in 2028 we begin all this again? And see if there's any appetite for equal marriage, or if there's anybody left in the sinking ship or if Parliament has forced our hand by then, maybe?

Years and years? Don't bother with actual equal marriage cos it'll take years and years? What does the Archbishop of York think has been going on all this time? Where the hell has he been? Could he be any more offensive if he tried?

What do I think should be done?

1. Nobody is a second class human being. So don't put out prayers for LGBTQI+ people that you wouldn't put out for straight people.

2. If you aren't going to allow a vote on equal marriage, then start the work on it today anyway. "This is the fullest pastoral provision we can do today - but also we are beginning the next stage. A commission to examine all that needs to be done to make equal marriage possible in the CofE. It will look at the legal questions, the liturgical provisions necessary, the options around alternative oversight that we will need to address (one of the options being no alternative oversight), and all other questions. This commission will be led by a senior bishop who has clearly declared they are in favour of LGBTQI+ people being able to be married in our churches. It will make recommendations to Synod within 5 years."

That's what I'd do. Because, Archbishop Years-and-Years, even when such a commission has done all that work, it will STILL take years to work out what to do and how to take it forward through Synod and make it reality. But by not doing any of this, you are not only not providing equality for LGBTQI+ people, you are guaranteeing even the possibility of such equality remains a generation away. 

3. Tell the truth this time.

At this week's press conference, Archbishop Justin said that LLF was a commission that had people from all walks of life - LGBTQI+ and straight, lay and ordained. I think I was one of five openly gay people on LLF. One of five among forty or fifty people. As an inclusion project that's not good. Technically, Justin wasn't lying; but he was misleading. 

So tell the truth this time. Either pack the next commission with people who know what it is to feel the wrong side of being a minority, so we can bring some passion to the story, or pack it with nice straight people who will make your life easier, or ensure BBC bias by allowing conservatives to balance out LGBTQI+ voices in a way that only makes sense at Lambeth but not in the real world. Your choice. Absolutely. But tell the truth about it. No misleading. No massaging facts to make everything feel better. 

Maybe that's why this all doesn't feel great: Jesus said - You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free. There's just not quite enough truth going round this week?

*****

Let me tell some truth.

The failure of all this feels very personal. I stuck it out on LLF because I thought I might get my one question heard: are we all equally human? I thought I had gotten heard. Clearly, I was wrong. I tried, I failed. 

And yet I believe in Jesus, who raises us up, who believes in us, whose love knows no bounds. I failed, but Jesus is Lord. Heck, how many times over the years has that been true? And if this time feels pretty awful, then the rising that is to come will feel even more glorious. 

Onwards and upwards.